Friendship is a promise
spoken only by the heart
It isn’t given by any pledge
It isn’t written on any paper
But friendship is a promise that is renewed
every time two friends meet and smile
and enjoy the good times
that come from simply being together.
It’s a promise to share both glad and sad times.
A promise to think of each other fondly
whether near or far apart.
Friendship is a promise spoken only by the heart.
A promise that you and I will always share
Dean Walley
Some people say we only try
To pressure them and make them buy
A piece of paper hard to read
Or an idea to fill a need
They’ll never have. They will not die
Or if they will, they need not try
To plan today for that event
Or on that plan to spend a cent.
“Insurance poor,” they often give
Or “worth more dead than while they live,”
As reasons not to stop and plan
The fate they share with every man.
“Too busy at this time,” they moan
“Not interested,” they hang up the phone
“Besides, my wife will probably
Marry another right after me.”
But persevere, I’m sure I must
Gain their attention and their trust
Help them to know that now’s the day
“I love you,” to their family they say.
So when he dies they need not fear
They’ll be provided for each year
Her love will grow, though he be gone
He’s helping her to carry on.
I’m very proud of what I do
I sell insurance, very true
But I do more. I make a way
For children’s laughter everyday
For wives’ and mothers’ peace of mind
O’er the unknown, they now can find.
A salesman now, but round the bend
I am the widow’s and orphan’s friend.
“God is Great” and “God is Gracious”. These are the names we had chosen for our two sons before they were born. When they arrived, God put their names to the test for His glory alone. Through their birth, God demonstrated His power and grace.
It started on 16 February 1981 when Joel came into this world three weeks early. That morning, Jenny noticed some blood stains and decided to see her gynaecologist, who suggested that she check into Mount Alvernia for rest and observation. Everything seemed fine up to the time the doctor examined her in the evening and left. Soon after, Jenny started to bleed profusely. Her doctor was recalled and she was rushed into the operating theatre.
Joel was kept in an incubator in Mount Alvernia for about a week. According to the gynaecologist, his lungs were not fully developed and he was breathing hard. Towards the end of the week, Joel contracted pneumonia and was turning bluish. The paediatrician strongly recommended that he be transferred to an intensive care unit at the Alexandra Hospital. After examining Joel and doing all the necessary tests, Dr KW Tan, Head of Paediatrics, Alexandra Hospital, gave me a briefing. Holding an X-ray film against the light, he told me that my son had ‘no lungs’. I was disoriented and felt the room spinning, until he explained that Joel’s lungs had collapsed. Without air, the lungs would not appear on the X-ray, Joel was given penicillin and his chances of pulling through were fifty-fifty.
We are grateful that during that period of about a month the church was behind us in prayer. I remember one sister saying that she was praying for Joel as if he were her own. Grace Assembly has always been our family. Thank God, my son grew stronger and was soon discharged. Joel is the name we have chosen for our eldest son, which means ‘God is Great’.
History has a way of repeating itself. On 25th January 1984, we went through what we had gone through three years before. It was like watching a video replay, except that this time the situation was more serious. Jenny bled a little in the morning, was admitted to Mount Alvernia for observation, visited by the same gynaecologist, and bled profusely after her doctor left. This time, I was around to see the blood and witness the situation. The two nurses were reassuring Jenny that everything was alright, but behind the screen and away from Jenny’s ears, they were panicking. They kept changing the sanitary sheets that quickly absorbed the blood.
This time round, Johann was rushed to Alexandra Hospital on the day he was born. The same Dr Tan saw me and said, ‘You again!’ Johann was seven weeks early and he could not breathe on his own. He was hooked to a respirator. At birth, he weighed 2.05 kilograms and he stayed in the ICU for about three months. During these times, he was hooked to many tubes and was pricked several times a day to test the oxygen level in his blood. The doctors were hoping to see him breathing on his own and acquiring a 20% oxygen level in his blood. His chances of survival was worse than Joel’s.
The birth of our two sons was trying period for Jenny and me. Our faith was put to the test. A Christian brother called me while Jenny was recuperating at home and Joel was in hospital. I remembered telling him I was prepared for the worst, and if we lost Johann, I would take Jenny away on a trip. That brother ‘lectured’ and exhorted me. He said that if God did not want us to have the child, He would not have given the child to us in the first place, and that we should claim the child in faith. Feeling encouraged, I shared this with Jenny and we prayed together. It was a wonderful spiritual experience. I prayed in tongues till I felt inner peace I never felt before and knew that things would be all right. Glory be to God! From that day on, or rather from that moment, Johann’s condition took a turn for the better. His oxygen readings began to improve. After 3 months in Alexandra Hospital, he was discharged.
Johann is an Austrian version of John which means ‘God is gracious’. When Johann was about two and a half years old, God again proved Himself to be gracious. It was a near-drowning incident and again God spared his life.
It was mid-1986, when Adeline, our teenage niece, and the two boys were swimming in the condominium pool while Jenny and I waited for our friends, Chris and Jannifer, to arrive. When we reached the pool with our guests, Johann came out from the baby pool to greet us. From then, Jenny and I split up. I showed Chris around the clubhouse while Jenny took Jannifer in the opposite direction. I assumed Johann was with Jenny, and Jenny assumed Johann was with me. When we met up shortly and realised that Johann was not around, we knew something had gone wrong. I ran towards the pool. From afar, I could see Adeline running towards me, and a body at the far end of the adult pool. It was Johann. When I reached Johann, his body was cold, his lips had turned blue and his stomach was bloated. I did not know what to do. I laid hands on Johann, prayed in tongues and cried at the same time. A crowd was gathering and Chris was asking if anyone knew how to apply CPR. No one responded and Chris quickly made an attempt. That brief moment seemed like a long time. Many things went through my mind and I actually thought Johann was gone. I continued to pray while Chris continued to apply CPR. For what seemed like a long while, nothing happened. Suddenly, Johann began to choke and vomited. We rushed him to NUH. The doctors were concerned about his brain, which could have been damaged due to the lack of oxygen for some time. Thank God for His graciousness! Johann’s mental capability today does not seemed impaired.
What can we say but that our God is great and gracious! He has delivered Joel and Johann from the brink of death. After these incidents, we are conscious that our two boys belong to God. As parents, we are just taking care of them on God’s behalf. We want and hope to remember that for the rest of our lives. We have dedicated them to God and constantly pray that God will use them according to His will.
Several years ago, I received a letter from ‘A Reader’ after he or she read my newsletter. ‘A Reader’ had a concern which I addressed as best as I could. I believe there are others, especially Christians, who may have similar questions. Here is an extract from his letter followed by my reply.
“ However, what doubted me was that when God is our provider, why do we need to insure ourselves against all illness, when God is our healer, great physician. And why do we need to take up big life insurance policy for our life which is given freely from God.
I am always not convinced to see people who said they trusted the Lord and yet take up big policies to protect both themselves and their family members & also those believers who are actually promoting insurance policy!
I hope I have not offended you in any way but do give a thought to my note to you. ”
My reply:
Insurance is not expressly forbidden nor authorised in the Bible. However, there are some Bible principles that should be considered in the matter.
Insurance is a financial planning tool at our disposal. It is saving up money for your wife and children if it is life insurance on the head of the home. It is saving up money to pay for a possible automobile accident when it is motor insurance. It is not unlike saving up money in the bank.
A Christian will have to make the proper decision about insurance on the basis of faith and his responsibility. The act of faith is strictly a personal matter between him and God, not universal. Some Christians have faith that God will heal them directly while others trust God to heal them through doctors. Do not expect everyone to do the same when they do not face the same situation in which they are challenged to exercise their faith. Otherwise, they may be guilty of negligence and also for not properly discharging the responsibilities God has given them as parents, children, etc. He has to have faith and trust the Lord about it to take the step. We ought not to tell anybody not to buy insurance or to drop it if he possesses any. We should encourage him to trust the Lord and seek His righteousness more and more. Then let him make the proper decision based on his calling, responsibility and faith in God.
Oftentimes, other people are involved and we ought not to ask them to act on our faith. For example, we carried insurance on the house because those from whom we made the hosing loan wanted that security. They had a right to ask for it, and so we carried insurance on the house to satisfy their need. Also, we owe it to God and society to ensure that our family are cared for. Think of it for a moment. If our loved ones need our contributions now while we are alive, won’t they need the same, if not more, when we are gone?
If we have dependants, we do our best to provide for them, not only while we are here on earth, but also after we are gone, or are unable to care for them. 1 Timothy 5:8 says “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an infidel.”
I am proud to be an insurance man. I often remind myself that “ Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress …”(James 1:27).
From the beginning to the end
so here I am ,
the first step of many to come .
and here I am ,
may we find love, grace and many good days .
here I write and declare ,
that it shall be as it is written !
- samuel koh, 7th Feb 2007
